Friends, I am more than convinced that our adversary is currently on the prowl to destroy the marriage union. Three times this week I have learned of adulterous affairs destroying a marriage. I didn't read about these in People magazine or hear about them "through the grapevine." No, all three are personal, close friends of mine. People that I thought I knew that have fallen into the trap of adultery, leaving in their wake of destruction the other spouse and multiple children - shell shocked and so, so hurt.
The above verse tells us that satan is seeking those whom he can devour. It also tells us that this means those who claim to be followers of Christ. It says, "your adversary." The devil is not an "adversary" to those who either willingly or unwillingly do his will anyway. An adversary by definition is someone or something that opposes your view - an enemy. Satan is the enemy of Christ and thus he is seeking to devour those who trust in Him.
Marriages are under intense spiritual attack right now. I know this because somehow along the way my husband and I have become untrained marriage counselors. Emphasis on untrained. We are always humbled beyond words when people seek us out for marriage advice. We have to chuckle to ourselves at God's sense of humor as well, because our own marriage has certainly seen its share of turmoil.
There is an underlying evil that is slithering between Christian marriages these days. It is as if satan has become so furious that his time is short that he is determined to ruin our credibility with the rest of the world. If we can't manage to hold it together, then why should anyone else even bother to try? What the "world" doesn't understand is that the true body of Christ has never claimed to be perfect. In fact, we claim to be utterly needy and dependent on Jesus for every breath we take. We claim that there is nothing good in us apart from Him. I can't hold my marriage or anything else together, unless He is right smack in the middle of it.
Somehow though, we have lost our way. Our marriages are not shining as a beacon of hope in a dark world as they were meant to. They are not portraying an accurate picture of Christ with His bride, as they were meant to. In fact, we are divorcing as much (some stats say more) than the "secular" world. What I am seeing more and more is that one spouse is involved in adultery or some other form of abuse and refuses to even try to reconcile his/her marriage. Lately, I have actually seen many cases where the other spouse was willing and desired to mend the marriage, however, obviously that can not happen when one person has his/her mind set against it. This leaves the willing spouse with no options at all to make it right. It leaves the children at a place that no child should ever be. Having to reconcile the emotions that come along with knowing that one parent has grievously hurt the other and refuses to make it right. They are left with the roiling emotions that go along with knowing that one of your parents has turned his/her back on everything they have taught you. Haven't we all taught our kids that they must confess when they sin and seek forgiveness? Haven't we taught them that true repentance means turning from your sinful behavior and going forward in a different direction? I have to wonder how the enemy has so blinded these otherwise loving and generous parents into believing that their choices will not reap consequences for generations to come. Children can not escape unscathed from things like this.
Please don't hear me say it is hopeless. Especially if you are reading and you are the "other" spouse. The one who wanted desperately to make it right. Our God is in the business of redemption and He does make all things new! I believe He will fight on the side of you and your children. They can be whole again through the redemptive blood of Christ, but no doubt they will carry battle scars for the rest of their lives. The key is to make their battle count. Teach them to lean on Christ, to be covered in His armor and to wield the Sword of the Spirit wisely. Do not let a bitter root grow in you or in them. God can and will use even this for His glory.
I am convicted though that our marriages need to be hedged in the supernatural protection of the Holy Spirit. Our husbands are tempted every day, just by getting out of bed. Television commercials, billboards, internet, and the women at the office all combine into a toxic combination. We are their helpers and the very least we can do is pray for them. I am convicted that I do not lift my friends and their marriages up enough and I don't lift my own marriage up enough. I would love to know that my marriage is covered in prayer on a daily basis and I would love to be a part of praying for my friend's marriages. To that end I have decided to start a marriage prayer calendar. If you would like to be a part of that, you can leave me a comment with the day of the month you would like to pray and fast for the others in the group. (Example, 3 indicates that every month on the 3rd day you will pray and fast for the others in the group). If I don't know you personally, that's ok, you can participate in our prayer group or maybe you can send a message to 30 of your friends and start your own! It would be awesome to see this spread.
Matthew 18:19-20 "Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them."
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