Heroes

We moved to Arizona three years ago.  In many ways, it has been the hardest thing our family has ever done.  We have had some really low moments, I won't lie.  We were settled in Florida.  We were happy and it had taken us a lot of years to get to that point.  We didn't want to leave.  But, God called and we followed.  I honestly don't know why He brought us here.  I could speculate about several things and some I may never know.  One thing I do know - because of our move, we met the Saunders.

My kids have long laughed at me about my lack of enthusiasm about "famous" people.  Honestly, I just don't care about autographs and following people around.  I feel like if I were famous, I would want to just go to the grocery store like a normal person and be left alone.  Occasionally, where we live, we see professional sports players in the grocery store and a few actresses who are from here get their hair done at the same place I do.  I smile and say hello if they are within speaking distance and if I had a chance to sit and chat with them, of course I would.  Yes, they have fame and influence that I don't have and of course, a lot more money - but at the end of the day, we are all just people and I am most impressed with the ones I know (like Jay Feely from the AZ Cardinals) who use their influence for good and lift the name of Jesus above their own.

Anyway, what I do get all giddy and excited about is the chance to meet people who are "famous" in my circle of adoption friends.  One of those people is Linny Saunders who blogs over at A Place Called Simplicity.  I have been reading Linny's blog for several years now.  I was following Linny's blog as she spent several weeks in Uganda bringing home their youngest treasure Ruby, who I have shared about in the past.  You can imagine my surprise when the exact same week Stan moved to Arizona, they arrived back in the states with Ruby and went directly to Phoenix Children's Hospital to evaluate her special needs.  They announced that they would be relocating from the small town in Colorado where they lived to the larger metro area of Phoenix in order to secure the best medical care possible for their tiny gem.

Not being one to shy away from meeting a hero - I immediately e-mailed Linny privately - gushing, squealing, and begging for an autograph - explaining that we too were relocating to Phoenix.  Soon after the kids and I arrived, this supermom of 12 invited our crazy family of 7 over for dinner.  Honestly, friends - these are the "famous" people I long to meet.  The ones whose entire lives are sold out for Jesus.  The real life heroes that I want my kids to emulate, that I want to be mentored by, that I just want to do life with.

Three years later, I am humbled and honored that God allows me to call Linny a friend.  A real life friend - we have prayed together, cried together, and laughed until we cried together over the past three years.  Our kids really enjoy each other's company, Stan and Dw really hit it off well, and every time we get together we end up making a pot of coffee, letting the kids stay up way past bedtimes and just telling stories of God's faithfulness late into the night.  Now we are also business partners in our Young Living business and we can "singlehandedly solve the world's health issues" in a single night -- according to our husbands, who shake their heads at us while we talk health and wellness.

The Saunders are the real deal friends.  They love Jesus, love the orphan and they believe in the promises of God.  They pray with fervent expectation and He moves.  The stories contained in their Memorial Box will blow you away!!  They are NOT perfect, they would not want me to insinuate at all that they are.  They are a family, just like yours and mine - they get aggravated at silly things, they make mistakes.  But, through it all they are thankful for what God has done, they trust Him for the outcome and they forgive.

About eighteen months ago their daughter Emma, a dear friend of Bryce's, embarked on the calling God placed on her life as a little girl.  She moved to Uganda.  Alone.  God has moved so many mountains and Emma is now the founder and director of The Gem Foundation.  We can not express our gratitude to God that He has allowed us to be just a very small  part of it.

Emma is 21 years old and her entire life is sold out to God's calling to serve the orphan in Uganda.  She is a tiny little thing - full of life and spunk and has a smile that can light up a room.  Her joy is palpable.  But, the reality of missional living is sometimes hard and dark.  It is a beautiful, glorious MESS.  Emma gets to see first hand, every day, the physical manifestation of the battle between good and evil.  The spiritual battle that rages around us all sometimes penetrates the spiritual realm and plants itself firmly in the midst of our reality.  Sometimes darkness covers and soldiers march and pestilence rages and babies can't breathe and people disappoint.

Please take a minute to read today's blog post at A Place Called Simplicity.   This is where the rubber meets the road.  This is why Jesus said, "In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart, I have overcome the world."  Yes - we know that Jason is dancing with Jesus and we are glad for the promise of eternity.  But, the reality is that Emma has buried two of her precious children in the past month.  The reality is that it hurts.  Excruciatingly.

Friends, there is a battle raging all around us for the souls of those that God has called.  There are missionaries like Emma all over the world and there are believers like you and me right here in America.  We need to be in prayer and fasting for one another.  We are in the fight of our lives - for the lives of our brothers and sisters around the globe.  We all have one common enemy - and despite the way it looks, it is not each other.  Satan would love nothing more than to discourage and devastate Emma to the point that she gives up her calling and comes back home.  He would like nothing more than to decimate our testimony in the eyes of a watching world.  There is but one thing in this life that truly matters and that is to glorify God.  The way we do that is to reach out in love and compassion to every man, woman, and child on the planet.  It is a big planet - but we serve a bigger God.  We must demonstrate that LIFE is precious - every life, every where.

Please pray for Emma, pray for missionaries around the world, pray for each other.  The battle that rages is raging from an enemy who knows his time is short.  Desperate, he is grasping - but God promises that He is sovereign and in control.  The enemy is on a short leash and his time is running out.

Let's end this strong.

Soapbox

If you read my blog at all, I know you think I have plenty of soapboxes, so you may be wondering which one is on the agenda today.  You are right, I do have plenty to say about several different things (just ask my poor, introverted husband), but lately, you may have noticed that the theme of my blog is mostly the orphan.  Yes, I still give you some unsolicited medical advice from time to time and believe me, I am still very adamant about the state of "health care" (or lack thereof) in our nation.  I still get really worked up over people who would rather pop a pill, or give one to their kids,than do what it takes to change their lifestyle.  I still give you my two cents worth on home schooling from time to time as well - and my thoughts on that really haven't changed much over the years, so you can always look in the archives if that interests you at all.

However, I have recently come to the realization that there are only a few things I am truly passionate about - Jesus, my family, and the orphan.  That's really it.  I have plenty of other interests, plenty of things I spend so much time researching that I could probably testify as an expert witness - but, nothing stirs up heart ache in me and the overwhelming need to spend hours on my knees before God like the plight of those most vulnerable children.  Their faces haunt my dreams and sometimes I am crushed by the weight they have to bear.  I want to spend my life advocating for them - and I pray that one day God gives our family the honor of being even more hands on.  "Send us!" is my daily prayer.

Today, I come to you pretty annoyed, to be quite frank.  Yesterday I, along with many other believers around the globe - I suspect mostly adoptive mommies like myself - spent the day in prayer for orphans around the world, specifically asking God to intervene in the Russian ban, to bring home the babies already promised to their families, and to shake believers, especially in America and other wealthy nations, to their very core.  As a mom of young children myself, I did not get to sit in my prayer closet all day, as I would have loved to do.  No, there were still meals to prepare, errands to run, and snuggles to give.  I did get a few segments of uninterrupted prayer time during the day, which was awesome - but, mostly I prayed constantly as I went through our normal daily activities.

Today though, as I peruse my Facebook I see comments that really just tick me off.  I have a large network of adoptive moms as my FB friends.  Many of them I have yet to meet in person, and I may not meet them until Heaven - but, we are sisters, not only in Christ, but also under the banner of adoption.  Our hearts are broken for these babies all over the world and I suspect that most of us are willing to follow God's call to the ends of the earth to advocate for, serve, and bring them home.

When I see comments along the lines of "Why are you so concerned about children in Russia, when there are starving children in America?" - then I am left almost speechless at the callousness of such a statement.

I said almost speechless - you should not be surprised that I do have a few things to say on the subject.

Here is the deal.  There are orphans and vulnerable children all over the world.  Upwards of 165,000,000 of them.  Way more if you count the ones who live in less than ideal home situations.  Every single one of these precious lives are creations of the Living God.  Every single one of them bear the Imago Dei.  The image of that same God.  They are all precious in his sight.  All.of.them.

That includes the ones in America, the ones in Ghana, Ethiopia, Uganda, Russia, Ukraine, China, Brazil, Cambodia, Guatemala - and any other place on the face of the globe.  He looks down on His creation and the way we treat human life and oh how He must grieve.  How far we have fallen from His original intent.

But, you know what else grieves His heart?  Looking down on His children, those of us who bear His name and are filled with His Holy Spirit - backbiting, pointing fingers, and telling each other what country in the world we "should" adopt from.  One of the pastors at our church has a sermon entitled "Keep Your Nose in Your Own Bag."  The premise of the sermon is that God gives each of us a life, and it is best if we live our own and not nose around in other people's.  If every one of the 2 billion people on earth who claim to know Jesus would live out of their own bag - there would not be an orphan crisis.

When I hear people say that American children are more deserving and those who have adopted internationally should take care of the children "at home," then I always ask them how many foster children or domestically adopted children they have.  You know what the overwhelming answer is?  NONE.  You know why?  Because those of us who have adopted a child, who know the joys and the emotional roller coaster that adoption brings, know that all children are precious and deserving of a family.  We do not care where you travel to bring home your next child - around the corner or around the world.  We only care that you stop talking about it and DO IT!!

God did bring us a son through a domestic adoption and we can not imagine our lives without him.  I love him to the moon and back and his adoption was ALL God.  I intended to do an international adoption and if God wills, I will do an international adoption in the future.  When Patrick came into our lives, it was clearly the will of God for us at that time.  We would not change a thing about it.  However, never once has the thought crossed my mind that he was more "worthy" than my friend's precious children from Ghana, or my other friend's precious girl from China, or my other friend's treasures from Uganda.  Neither are those children more worthy than the three babies other friend's of ours adopted from right here in our home town.

All of these children need and deserve a family.  And no one has the right to imply (or outright say) that any child is more worthy of one than another based on where on earth they live.  It just blows me away that people can be so callous.

I have to say that we have never had anyone make a negative comment about our adopting Patrick - a few people did imply that we should have used the foster system instead of a private adoption.  To them I said, and I will say it again - Patrick's adoption prevented him from ever being in foster care, where he would have surely ended up.  Our precious friends who are foster parents are absolute heroes in my eyes, and one day God may indeed call me to be one too.  I will embrace it.

My point is, that we all have a job to do.  None is more important than the other and we are not behaving in a Christ like manner when we point fingers at each other for fulfilling God's call to the orphan.  Can we not encourage, support, and help each other along this path, which is not always an easy one?  Can we not look at every child as deserving of a family, no matter where they were born.

If you are one of those who has thought (or said) the old phrase, "We need to clean up our own doorstep before we start sweeping someone else's?" - then, I have a piece of advice for you.  Go ahead.  Do it.  Start cleaning up your own doorstep.  Bring American foster children into your home, adopt children domestically, mentor a child at a local Big Brother or Big Sister Club, or invest some other way in the life of a needy American child.  That's fine, great in fact.  But, I can promise you one thing, once you look into the eyes of a vulnerable child - helpless, hurting, and desperate, once you invest your life in the life of one of these innocent ones, and allow God to change your heart, your entire outlook will change. You will realize that it doesn't matter where they are born, what color their skin is, what special needs they have, or what they have been through - ALL that matters is that they need the love of a forever family.  All that matters is that they are beautiful people, with much to offer if given a chance at life.  You will forget that you ever cared what country they were born in.

So, if American children are your calling, then good for you.  Go for it!!  But, allow others to follow God's call on their life, because there are children all over the world with only one need - the need for a mommy and daddy to kiss them goodnight and brothers and sisters to play with.  The need for a real forever family.

Let's stop trying to tell other people what God must "surely" want from them.  God's call on each of our lives is personal.  Just follow the one He places on you.  We will all be a lot better off.

Come Lord Jesus

Truly, I can not stand to look at the picture below.  I posted it on my blog quite a while back when it was sent to me by a personal friend of the lady who took it.  This was taken in an Eastern European "laying room."  These are the conditions that many of the children that America can no longer adopt live in.  This is the picture the media needs to show the public.  The truth.  These children are treated like animals, yet we are going to embroil them in a political battle that no one can win and the only real losers are the innocents.  Politicians in favor of this ban have stated that there is no need to "turn this into a tragedy."  Friends, this is a tragedy!  Look a little closer at that picture.

This is a tragedy!!

I want you to do something for me right now, stop reading and go over to A Place Called Simplicity to my friend Linny's blog.  I agree 110% with what she says.  This is playing out in Russia, but it is not really about Russia at all.  It is about the church.  It is about America.

Did you read it?  Did you hear her heart?  If you don't already read A Place Called Simplicity then maybe you don't know that Linny and her husband Dwight just completed their 9th adoption, bringing their grand total to 12 children!  Their 19 year old daughter Emma is leaving in just 9 days to move to Uganda as a full time missionary to the orphan.  Linny and Dwight are the founders of International Voice of the Orphan and Dwight left a position as a pastor to fulfill God's call on their lives as missionaries to the least of these.

We are beyond blessed to call them personal friends.  They are invested and they are the real thing.  They live what they claim to believe and when they speak about hearing from God - I sit up and take notice.  I have never known anyone in my life who spends more time fasting and on their knees before the Lord than this couple.

Friends, the church in America is apathetic at best.  Our culture is so caught up in the next electronic device, the next popular fad, and the next thing that will make our lives more convenient that we completely forget that there are children, humans made in the image of God, who live in these horrendous conditions.

 Look at the picture again.  I know you don't want to see it.  I don't either, but we must.  For their sakes, we must.

We have to stop thinking only of ourselves and our so called "problems."  There are people in this world with real problems.  I know there are people in this country with real problems too.  Devastating illnesses, frightening financial situations, and tragic loss like we just experienced in Newtown, CT and like the losses from Hurricane Sandy.  I do not in any way want to make light of those things.  However, more often in our nation there is apathy.  There is self absorption to the point of being just plain ridiculous.  We are so concerned that our lives be "fair" and that no one offends us or we don't offend anyone else, that we run over or ignore anyone in our way on our path to utopia.

Church, these babies need you.  They need for us to stop talking about the plight of the orphan and do something about it.  They need for the real men in this country to stop crunching the numbers to see if it all works out just right and just take a giant leap of faith.  They need for the pastors in this country to stop worrying about offending someone and start preaching the truth.  "Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of God is this, to care for widows and orphans and keep yourself unstained by the world."  If churches spent as much time and effort on the most vulnerable among us as they do on building projects and programs that tickle everyone's ears, then we wouldn't have an orphan crisis.

These babies need mommies to kiss them goodnight, daddies to wrestle with, and brothers and sisters to play (and argue) with.  We have got to stop thinking about what it is going to cost us and get something done.  Jesus did not ask us to crunch the numbers, or worry about how our other kids might "miss" something with too many siblings.  He did not ask us to make sure we had it all together before we obeyed Him.  No, He clearly said, "Take up your cross and follow me.  Whoever loses His life will find it."  He said He is the defender of the fatherless.

He is.

He will cover all the petty excuses we give for inaction.  But, I believe like Linny does, that He is lifting His hand of mercy.  I pray it isn't so, and on Saturday, the 29th, I will be joining the Saunders family and many others around the world for a day of prayer and fasting, begging Him to stay His hand.  To have mercy on these babies and on us, though we hardly deserve it.

Will you join us in prayer and fasting?  Will you say, with Linny, "Not on my watch!"  Will you DO something for these precious ones?  Together, let's humble ourselves before our Heavenly Father, humbly seek forgiveness for our callous attitude, and pray that He moves mountains and crumbles the barriers we have built up in our hearts.  Please, friends, I can't get these children out of my mind.  They are waiting and waiting for someone to come for them.

Together, we can be the hands and feet of Jesus, right in your backyard or around the world.  Please, just do something.

Just A Family

Our sweet two year old

"Important to realize.  We adopt not because we are rescuers.  No, we adopt because we are the rescued."  David Platt

If you don't know who David Platt is, he is the author of the book Radical and pastor of a large church in Birmingham, Alabama.

David Platt is passionate about the orphan, the widow, and the poor.  Those in society most overlooked.  

His passion is contagious, and I dare you to read Radical and not be changed.  It is a fairly short, easy to read, but hard to swallow, statement on "church" in America and truly he tells it like it is.

"We are settling for a Christianity that revolves around catering to ourselves when the central message of Christianity is actually about abandoning ourselves."  Ouch.  How many of us want to hear that message on Sunday morning?  It is the truth though, and for too long the church in America has preached a gospel that says God wants us to be happy and prosperous.  I believe that is the lie that satan has sold us, and we in America have bought it - hook, line, and sinker.  

God wants us to be holy, as He is holy.  Happiness is an emotion, it goes and comes with the day - or the hour.  Joy is lasting and deep, and comes from walking closely with our Creator.  Joy can be found in any circumstance.  Happiness, at its true definition, is an illusion.

When you are the parent of a child who is adopted, you often endure people telling you how "lucky" your baby is to be in your family or how "wonderful" it is that you "saved" him or her.  I know most people mean well and if you are reading and have said this to me, I am not in any way offended.  I do want to offer my two cents worth on the subject of adoption, though.  

People go into adoption for a myriad of reasons, but at the end of the day, we are just parents.  Just a family, like any other.  We don't distinguish between our "biological" children and our "adopted" ones.  By the way, please don't ever distinguish a person's children by their "adopted" ones and their "own."  Again, I know most people mean well, but this can be a really hurtful statement.  They are all our "own" children and we do not view them as any different.  Yes, I know which ones I gave birth to and which one is adopted, and in some families it is obvious - but, they are all my "own" children.  

I love the concept of adoption.  It is such a parallel to our relationship with God and His finished work on the cross through the sacrifice of Jesus.  He adopted us as sons and daughters and now our relationship is complete, whole, and eternal.  He sees us as His very own and we are entitled to all of the inheritance of "natural born" children.  We are all God's own through the miracle of adoption.

So, why, as followers of Jesus, is adoption important?  Are we all on some power trip, running all over the world like Angelina Jolie, "saving" children from lives of poverty?  I have been accused of this, so I know it is not all that far fetched.  

I certainly can't speak for everyone, and I don't know why Angelina Jolie adopts - I hope because she loves children and I certainly don't know her, so I can't say anything to the contrary.  However, as a follower of Jesus Christ, I adopt because I acknowledge what has been done for me.  I did not adopt my sweet baby boy to "save" him.  I don't know what his life would have been like without us, but I do know that God's purposes for Patrick's life are sovereign, and with or without me, Patrick will grow up to be whatever God plans for him to be.  It is not about me rescuing him and bringing him into a "better" life.  It is about God rescuing me and breaking my heart for the things that break His.  It is about seeing a need and doing our very best to meet that need, in the name of Jesus.  Patrick's birth mom had a need.  She needed for her son, whom she loved, to be raised in the kind of home that she could not provide.  We are privileged and honored to help her meet that need.  

Our son is a joy and a blessing in our life.  We cherish him and love him with our whole hearts.  The blessings are ALL ours and if anyone has done any "saving" it is him.  He has saved us from a life of thinking only about ourselves.  He has saved us from saying things like, "we are too old" or "we don't want to start over."   

Furthermore, at the end of the day, we are just a family.  I get aggravated when my little guy dumps an entire bag of chips on the floor and laughs, or throws a huge fit because he doesn't want to sit in his car seat.  I struggle not lose my temper sometimes - and sometimes I do lose it.  I feel overwhelmed, stressed out, and like I can barely accomplish the bare minimum some days.  I am not a super mom.  In fact, I can assure you that I am one of the most disorganized, non domestic women you have ever met.

When I say I want to adopt more children, I am often told I must have tons of patience or what a "good" person I am.  Apart from Christ, I am not a "good" person and I am not capable of doing a "good" thing.  Anything good that comes out of me, is only a reflection of Him.  I want to adopt more children because that is what followers of Jesus do.  They see their brothers and sisters in need and they try to offer a cup of cold water in the name of Jesus.  As long as there are children going to bed at night without a mommy and daddy, then I am willing to do my best to meet their needs, and the needs of their birth parents, many of whom truly do love their children and simply can not care for them.  Just like I would want one of my brothers and sisters to do for me if it were my children going to bed hungry and cold and alone.

When all is said and done, we get to step into what God is doing AND we get to be blessed with precious children to love on.  There is nothing any better than that.

Africa in Her Heart

My baby girl is in love.  With a country.  Bryce's trip to Africa has changed her life.  I knew it would.  I knew she would come back broken.  I became infatuated with Ethiopia years and years ago.  I have read books about the culture, I have looked at thousands of pictures online of the landscape and the people.  In recent years, I have scoured adoption blogs of people who have adopted from there and read their stories over and over and over.  I love a place I have never even been and I have talked about it so much that all of my children have a curiosity about it, too.

Now, Bryce has been there. She has endured the endless flight. She has smelled the potent combination of diesel, animal waste, and coffee and she has and felt the dirt on her feet.  She has heard the sounds - animal noises, honking horns, harsh voices talking in Amharic - sounding angry, even when they aren't.  She has seen the faces of the beautiful people who live there, seen the joy that radiates from their very souls, and touched their beautiful cocoa colored skin.  She has held their hands and washed their feet.

She is hopelessly smitten.

She left part of her heart on that continent and she is plotting her way back, even now.  I truly think that if given the opportunity, she would be on the next flight over - one way.  She is convinced God is going to call her to live there and I wouldn't be surprised.  I have heard from her group leaders that she had a special grace about being there.  Everyone in the group was not thrilled to be in Africa.  Many were there out of pure and simple obedience.  God told them to go and go they did.  I admire them for that.  Obviously, God had something for them to do and/or learn there.  They obeyed and He was glorified.

Bryce, on the other hand, loved it all - even the horrible parts.  She loved the food, she loved the sounds and smells.  She loved, loved, loved the kids.  Especially the older ones.  The street boys that no one typically wants to engage.  The older girls that have been through things that we can't even imagine.  These were the ones who most tugged at her heart.  Sure, she loved hugging on those little babies - their precious smiles lighting up the room.  Sure, they were cute and cuddly, but everyone loves them.  She felt God drawing her towards the ones usually overlooked.  The older boys, who have been raised on the streets - skeptical, maybe even dishonest.  The teenage girl who had been repeatedly raped and abused, but has now found her way to a place where she is getting help, learning about Jesus.

I am so proud of my girl.  She got on that plane all by herself, with NO hesitation whatsoever.  No anxiety about being with a group of people she didn't know for ten days.  No reservations about whether or not God had called her to go.  Now, she is home, but she is aching.  She is in that place that we all must be at certain points in our lives.  She is wrestling with what God showed her and what He wants her to do.

Sometimes I notice her, fingering the necklace that she wears all the time now.  The one she bought in the country - a flattened piece of gold shaped like Africa.  She rubs it and her mind goes back there - across the ocean to a beautiful, yet desperate place.  A place that God has forever forged into her soul. A place where the poverty and destitution is overwhelmed by the deep, abiding joy that spills out of the people.  People, unstained by the greed and excess of life in America.  People that God has blessed immensely with His very presence.  Oh, we may look like we have it all while they look destitute, but I think Bryce would agree that we have a lot to learn about what it means to trust God and live lives full of pure, unadulterated JOY.

Bryce's blog address is www.christianbryce.wordpress.com - please visit her there and hear about her experiences in her own words.  She is a WAY better writer than her mom.  You will be blessed.

She's Back!!

I am so happy to have my girl back.  Thanks for all of your prayers.  She has been sleeping so much we really haven't even had time to sit down and go through all of her pictures.  We have heard so many beautiful stories already.  Her heart is changed.  God is like that.  She has fallen in love with a country that I have been fascinated with as long as I can remember (and I haven't even been there yet.)

As soon as she comes back to life, I am sure she will start blogging about her experiences and I will link you to her blog.

Soon, I plan to share about how gracious and amazing God was in regards to her health.  I want to shout it from the rooftops that traveling to foreign countries does not have to entail an endless list of toxic vaccines and medications!  My girl is back and she is healthy -- I want to tell you what we did.

More later...

Group Photo

This is Ordinary Hero's 1st team for the Summer of 2012!!  Don't they look like a fabulous group?  God is using them so much this week as they minister in Ethiopia.  I am so happy that my baby girl is part of this trip.  I pray she makes lifelong friends, falls in love with the country, draws closer to the heart of God, and leaves there forever changed.

Just a Few Pictures

This is the first picture Bryce sent me of her day!  She is all smiles and this little one melts my heart.

So does this one.  Big eyes that remind me of when Patrick was a baby.  

Love the smiles worn by both sweet girls in this one.

I don't have a lot to say today.  I haven't talked to Bryce yet tonight.  It is 6:30 am there now and she is getting up as we are getting ready for bed.  We have been trying to video chat about 10:00 pm our time, while they are waiting for breakfast.  Maybe I will have more updates tomorrow.  I don't know where these pictures were taken - their plans were to feed and play with some street kids and visit an HIV home, then finish off the day with an authentic Ethiopian meal.  I have heard though, that plans in Africa are apt to change, so I don't know how the day actually went.  Thanks for continuing to pray for my girl!!

Why Go?

I have not been asked this question regarding Bryce's trip to Ethiopia, but I know many people who have been asked this over the years - both about mission trips and about adoption.  


Why do you spend several thousand dollars to travel around the world for little more than a week, when you could have donated that same amount of money?  The same question arises about adoption.  Why spend tens of thousands of dollars to adopt a baby when you could donate that amount and feed many more?


These are good questions and when asked with sincerity, I appreciate that the person asking felt comfortable to do so.  I also assume that the person asking truly wants to hear the answer.  And there is an answer.  A very very good one.


I will start with the mission trips.  Yes, it is true that this trip Bryce is on cost her several thousand dollars.  God brought in the entire amount she needed, though, plus some donations.  Her dad and I supplemented the donations she wanted to take with her.  It is also true that she will only be on the ground in Africa for eight days.  What can you do in eight days that will make a lasting difference?  Well, you can read their Day 1 update on the Ordinary Hero blog, but as you can see they spent day one loving on children in a transition home.  These particular children have been adopted and the home is full of anticipation and joy.  We have personally prayed for many of the children by name that Bryce was able to hug on today. They are no longer just faces on our computer screen, now she has heard their voices, seen their smiles, and kissed their precious faces.  


They also gave manicures and pedicures to the nannies and gave them a much needed break from their jobs as caregivers.  Don't mistake this as a small thing.  They literally washed the hands and feet of the saints who are in the trenches day in and day out.  Women who have chosen to give their very lives to care for these orphaned or abandoned children.  This must be a sometimes lonely and frustrating job.  I know how unappreciated I feel sometimes as a stay at home mom - in America, with every conceivable convenience, and a husband who loves me.  These women care daily for children that are not their own, with very little in the way of comforts, and not too many people telling them they are doing a good job.  To have a group of women come in and pamper them and give them a few hours "off" is a HUGE, HUGE thing.  Much different, and certainly more personal than a check in the mail.


So, in just one day they have blessed a multitude of children and the women who care for them in ways that they will not soon forget.  That is only Day 1.  They have seven more days to go.  Is it worth it to sacrifice a week and a few thousand dollars to let someone know on such a personal level that you care what they go through?  That you care enough to share in just a small part of the life they live daily?  


"How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion, “Your God reigns.” Isaiah 52:7


Today, these few Americans who offered the very small sacrifice of a week of their time to God, received the blessing a hundred fold.  They also were able to, for a brief moment, comfort and encourage these nannies.  We all serve the same big, big God and no matter where we live, whether in the slums of Ethiopia or the suburbs of America, we all have a hole in our very souls that can only be filled by Him.  


Is it worth it?  You bet!!


As for adoption, you can imagine I have plenty to say on that subject, most of which I will save for another day.  Suffice it to say that basically the same principles apply.  Yes, we could have donated the money we spent on Patrick's adoption to some very worthy organization - and there are plenty of them out there, working very hard to feed the hungry and clothe the needy.  However, we are human beings created in the image of a very relational God and He designed us to live within a family unit.  Children thrive in families.  Even in places like Ethiopia where the nannies are usually loving and kind, they will testify that there is only so much they can do when they have so many children to care for.  Children need a mom and dad and brothers and sisters. (I do believe singles should adopt and couples with no other children, so don't take that last statement totally literally). 


Children who live their entire lives in orphanages feel unworthy and abandoned.  As they get older, they don't believe that anyone could ever want them.  It affects their entire lives.  There are websites that contain the profiles of young adults, over 18, who have aged out of the system, begging to be "adopted" even as adults, so that they have a family of their own.  It is a sad reality that over 163,000,000 children and countless adults have no one to call their own.  Can you even imagine?


Adoption is the very picture of how God relates to us.  It is worth every penny a million times over to adopt children and then raise them to love the Lord and serve Him.  Besides, the biggest blessing of adoption is not for the child you supposedly "saved" - the biggest blessing is yours.  You get to be a part of God's redemptive plan in the life of a particular child or children.  You get to be involved in something that God could have easily done without you.  He doesn't need you, He can find someone who is willing, but He chooses to allow you to participate.  It is an awesome responsibility and it is amazing to watch Him knit families together.  All colors, all ages, all "needs" - knit together into a unbreakable bond called a family.  It is worth every cent and every sleepless night to be called by the Creator of the Universe to participate in His plans.


It is my honor and great privilege for this little boy to call me Mommy.

I would do it over and over again.


**I want to add a bit to this blog post.  Bryce has only been in Ethiopia one day, but here is a quote that she wrote to me after she read this particular post.


"Another very important reason to GO. A trip like this changes your heart. Don't fool yourself into thinking you don't need a heart change. God has so much to teach us all about His heart. A trip like this is life changing in so many ways. Even after only being here one day I understand that my main purpose on this trip is for God to teach me about love and compassion and sacrifice... I am also here to bless others, but there is only so much I can do for the people in such a small amount of time. The little bit I can do personally for the beautiful people here is worth the time and money... but the heart change in all of us on my team here will last for a lifetime."


God is in the business of heart change.  If every single person who takes a short term mission trip goes back home and in turn blesses someone else - then God is glorified.  GO and see what God can do!!

Therefore My Heart Is Glad...

I got to video chat with Bryce this morning!  It was early evening for her and she was exhausted.  Even with Benadryl, she did not get much sleep on the fourteen hour flight to Africa.  She was exhausted, but so full of joy.  They had been to a children's home for children who have been adopted and are awaiting their new Moms and Dads to pick them up.  She got to meet and snuggle with some of the children we have seen on Ordinary Hero's waiting child list.  Children we have prayed specifically for who are now part of a forever family.  She particularly fell in love with a little treasure named Elijah.  He has hydrocephalus like our friend's precious daughter Ruby. You can read her story here. I could tell by her voice she would have been begging us to bring him home if he didn't already have a family. She couldn't take any pictures with the kids in the transition home because they are adopted, but soon the pictures are coming.

In truth, Bryce is hoping to be able to spot her next sibling while she is there and I am meanwhile diligently praying that if he or she is there waiting that it would happen that way.  How awesome to be able to tell him or her that Bryce, directed by the Holy Spirit, "found" him or her in Ethiopia on her very first out of the country mission trip!

As you can probably guess, I am praying almost constantly for Bryce and her team.  Of course, I want her to be healthy and safe, but I am trying hard not to make her health and safety my top priority as I pray.  Francis Chan speaks of this in his book Crazy Love.  We always say things like, "I don't care if the baby is a boy or girl, as long as it is healthy," or "I just want her to be safe and healthy while she is gone."  Please don't get me wrong, I sent her with so many pills, sprays, and oils - all designed to keep her healthy- that she could start her own pharmacy in Africa.  I desperately want my baby girl to stay safe.  But, we serve a dangerous God.  Not a play it safe, stay in your comfort zone kind of God.  He is big and wild and more about the business of holiness than happiness.  He wants to use my baby girl and me (and you) to spread the Gospel to the uttermost parts of the earth.  Those places are not tame.  They are not safe and secure.  People get hurt in these places.  People even die there - physically and figuratively.  At the very least we need to die to self to find true contentment and joy.

The past couple of days God gave me Psalm 16 and I have read it over and over.  I am going to copy it in its entirety at the bottom of this post because it is just so powerful.  I want Bryce to find fullness of joy in the presence of Jesus. It is the only place where there is truly life.  It is the only place where the cares of this world fade away and true joy remains.  I want this for all of my children.  I want more of Jesus.

Psalm 16

Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.
I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
     I have no good apart from you.”

As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones,
    in whom is all my delight.

The sorrows of those who run after another god shall multiply;
    their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out
    or take their names on my lips.

The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
    you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
    indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

I bless the Lord who gives me counsel;
    in the night also my heart instructs me.
I have set the Lord always before me;
    because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;
    my flesh also dwells secure.
For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol,
     or let your holy one see corruption.

You make known to me the path of life;
    in your presence there is fullness of joy;
    at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

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And.......She's Off!!!

Today, I hit a milestone in my parenting journey.  Today, I had to let go.  There have been plenty of milestones in the past 18 and a half years.  She took her first steps, she said her first words, she learned to read, she accepted Jesus as her personal Lord and Savior, she started Kindergarten, Middle School, and High School.  She got her driver's license.  Two weeks ago, she graduated from high school.  

All of those are really cool things.  Some are really big things.  Her relationship with Christ is what makes her who she is. That high school diploma came with a lot of blood, sweat, and tears.  Some of these things required me to step back and realize that I am not the one in control, no matter how much I sometimes want to believe I am.  The first time she drove away in the car alone, I thought I might be sick.

Today, though trumps all of those other things.  Today, my firstborn baby girl, the one who (along with her twin brother) first made me a Mommy, boarded a plane to Addis, Ethiopia - alone.  It was her tiny self that I first held, first locked eyes with.  Her tiny fingers that I counted first.  Her cry that first melted my heart.  It was with the birth of this girl and her brother that I realized that part of me would forever live outside of my body.

There are no words adequate to describe how it feels to watch your child bloom before your eyes.  We took her to the airport this morning and she showed no fear, no anxiety.  Only courage.  Courage that only comes from complete confidence and childlike faith in our Savior, Jesus Christ.  

We raised her for this.  We learned together at home her entire educational career.  We prayed, studied, read, and trained - together.  Stan and I prayed for her, as we do all of our children, that she would follow God's call on her life.  We want them to be sold out for Jesus Christ, no matter the cost.  I begged God to send my children out to be used by Him.  Just as I beg Him to send me.  It is what I wanted and what I have prayed and waited for.

I have to tell you though, as a Mom, it wrenches your heart out.  I am not going to be there to remind her to take her vitamins (all 500 pills I packed her!).  I am not going to be there to hold her hand and wipe her face with a cloth if she does get sick.  I am not going to be there to protect her.  And if I am being perfectly honest, I will admit that it hurts that I will miss this first.  By home schooling, I have witnessed every first in her life.  I taught her to read, I prayed with her to receive Christ, I taught her to drive.  We have spent most of our waking moments together for eighteen years and I am so incredibly thankful for that.  

This trip is going to change her life.  It may very well be the most important thing, outside of the beginning of her walk with Jesus, that has ever happened in her life.  She will never be the same after this.  She will be forever broken for the things that break the heart of God.  I am so excited about what God is going to do with her life after this.  He is going to use her to change the world.  I want to be there.  

However, as much as I want to be there and as much as I know in my heart that one day I will go, this trip is hers.  She needed to do this alone.  She needs to see God working in her life - not just in mine.  I want her to mesh with the other team members on her own.  I want her to make lifelong friends, bound by a bond that can never be broken by distance - the bond that is only forged between brothers and sisters in Christ.

I will keep you posted as she updates us on what God is doing this week in Africa.  I would so appreciate your prayers for their team.

The Least of These

Sometimes I feel like a broken record.  I feel like everyone around me is sick too death of hearing me go on and on about the orphan.  Every day with a new "cause" and a new focus.  Believe me when I tell you that many, probably most days, I get tired of hearing myself.  The problem is, I can't get away from me. With one click of your mouse, you can make me go away.  My husband and kids are not so fortunate, but you, reader, you are.  You don't have to listen and you can go back to your world of Starbucks and soccer games - or Chikfila drive thrus and gas at $3.50 a gallon.

Ten years ago, in a hotel in Chicago, I asked God to break my heart for the things that break His.  I asked Him to help me see people like He does and to help me love - for real. I'm not sure I have ever had a prayer answered so quickly.

The good news is - He did.

The bad news is - He did.

I walked out of my hotel room that day and the second I opened the lobby door and hit the streets, I knew I was forever changed.  Every person I saw had pain shining in their eyes.  I could read it.  I did not see a crowd surging down the sidewalks of one of America's oldest and largest cities, I saw individual people.  Thousands, surging by me and I was paralyzed.  I stopped and sat on a bench and watched them walk by.  I met their eyes.  I bought coffee for several homeless people and as I prayed for them, I daydreamed about how I could help.  I saw them in my mind's eye, clean and sober - laughing and sitting across from me at Starbucks, drinking a latte and talking about their new jobs.  I could not stop crying.

Soon enough, God drew my heart to the plight of the orphan.  Then, He put some widows in my life.  It doesn't matter who or what the circumstances, I walk around with my heart outside of my body most of the time.  I want desperately to make a difference in some one's life.  I want desperately for the world to know my Jesus.  I want to erase the pain I see in the eyes of the people I pass on the street.

And I am just going to be honest here - some days I want to go back to the time before I prayed that prayer.  I was ignorant then.  Caught up in my own American dream.  Living life, with a corporate executive husband, three kids and a dog.  I didn't notice what other people were going through.  We took our kids to church - and Sunday School.  I took our old clothes to the local charity outreach, we sponsored a Compassion child, and gave money to our church.  I did my part, thankyouverymuch.  And you know what, it didn't hurt nearly as much.

Now, I am a hot mess.  I can't make it through an entire day without crying, many times weeping.  It doesn't take much to set me off - a Gotcha Day video does it every.single.time and pictures like this one.........my heart shatters in a million pieces!



I am just going to be brutally honest with you - I made this picture smaller than normal for this post because I can't stand to look at it!!  Many of you may think it is completely inappropriate that I have put it on here at all and ten years ago, I would have agreed with you.  It disturbs my sensibilities.  My huge box of Valentine's Day chocolates just doesn't taste as good anymore.  It makes me feel physically ill to see these boys, too old to be stripped naked in a common room, and emaciated beyond what my mind can comprehend.  These boys are just a tiny, tiny fraction of the total number of children who have been transferred to institutions in Eastern European countries.  "Laying rooms" these are called.  One of my favorite bloggers, Adeye at No Greater Joy Mom is doing a series on these institutions.  She feels, and I agree, that unless you stalk scour adoption blogs and agency websites, like we do - you probably don't conjure up images like this when you think of institutions.  In America, we think of "institutions" as government run organizations - schools, orphanages, hospitals.  That is not what is going on in these countries.  I will let you read her blog to get the details because she has adopted a child from one of these places, and she is calling on other parents who have to write their experiences.  Adeye and her husband have a precious little girl who was left alone in a crib for five years!!  FIVE!  She was labeled hopeless and basically left to die.  You can read all about Hailee on Adeye's blog and this little one is a precious gem to her family.  She is full of light and laughter, and HOPE!



Friends, He is whispering and He is calling and I believe that there is still hope within the American church.  Things are changing and people are becoming more aware. I sense the rumbling of the Spirit as He moves - asking, "Who will go?"  Where much is given, much is expected.  As Americans, the world is watching us.  The orphans of the world are begging us.  We have NO excuses except our own selfishness.  We have to take responsibility for this crisis.  Again, I will say, it is OUR problem.  We have the message of the gospel, the good news that the world most needs to hear.  Will we refuse to share it with those most vulnerable?  Please, church, please examine your heart.  Look long and hard at that picture - no matter how it turns your stomach.  Put the faces of your precious children on those emaciated bodies.  They are little souls.  They need us.

“Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
   and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
   and break every yoke?
Is it not to share your food with the hungry
   and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe them,
   and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
   and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
   and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
   you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

   “If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
   with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
   and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
   and your night will become like the noonday.
The LORD will guide you always;
   he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
   and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
   like a spring whose waters never fail.
Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
   and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
   Restorer of Streets with Dwellings."

Isaiah 58