I had decided to get on here and type a post to update y'all on how we are doing with the move. The short of it is, I leave our home two weeks from Saturday to drive across the country with our baby, our 9 year old, our dog, and our turtle. Before we leave I must figure out how to pack everything we are going to need for the next three months and it must fit into the aforementioned car (with all the children and animals) or in the three suitcases our older children will take on the airplane. Also before I leave, the entire house must be ready to put on the market, with clean corners and NO clutter. My husband has now been MIA for 8 weeks! Are you laughing yet? Because really, that is all there is to do in situations like this. Honestly, I should be way more stressed than I am!
As I was trying to think of how to articulately describe our situation, I came across something on another blog that is far and away more important than our day to day stresses. This "orphan's prayer" has me in tears tonight (are you surprised??). As Thanksgiving approaches I have noticed others on Facebook and blogs counting down the days with something they are grateful for each day. I must admit I have not been doing that - at least not on Facebook. Since reading the book 1,000 Gifts recently, I have been keeping a gratitude journal and I have been trying to see the blessings in the little things. Things like the sticky kisses I got from my toddler after he ate the espresso truffles he found in the pantry. Or, the way the tiny little white flowers bloom and smother the South Florida lawns this time of year. I don't know what they are, but we call them "Florida snow." I love it when the sunset splatters pink, orange, and yellow all over the Western sky and when the mornings are cool enough to breathe deeply and go for a walk in a sweatshirt.
With all the things I have to be thankful for, I just can't complain about our move. Is it hard? Yes, of course. Is it emotional? Absolutely. Will I be SO, SO glad when we are settled in Arizona? You bet! However, as usual, I am coming back around to the orphan. I asked God years ago to break my heart for what breaks His. I remember where I was when I did it. That is a prayer He did not even hesitate half a second to answer. I was in a hotel room in Chicago and as soon as I walked out the door after praying that prayer, I saw the people on the street with completely different eyes. Suddenly, everyone had a story. They were not just a sea of faces. I saw the pain etched on each face I passed. The homeless men and women sitting on benches or hunched in doorways were real people, with families and heartbreaking stories. It broke me to pieces. As I usually do when faced with something I can't handle emotionally, I wrote about it. I remember sitting in the park that day with an open notebook (this was way before my blogging days) - just writing and writing. Words and prayers poured out of me and I begged God to show me what to do with the pain.
I will have to be completely honest and tell you that even now, years later, I don't necessarily feel that He has given me a clear answer as to what to do with the pain. Maybe there really is no clear answer this side of Heaven. Maybe the pain is what reminds me of all that He sacrificed that I might live. As Laura Story says in her song "Blessings," maybe it is the pain that reminds me that this world is not my home. What to do with the pain and brokenness haunts me every single day. There is not a day, and usually not an hour that goes by that the faces of the lost don't flash through my mind. Now, He has given me the calling of advocating for orphans. Children who go to bed at night, alone in an orphanage full of others just like them, haunt my dreams and my waking hours. I can't get them out of my head. I obsessively read the blogs of others who advocate for them. I pray constantly for whatever need God has clearly given me to pray for that day. He is moving. Children are being rescued and redeemed, brought into real forever families. Sick, sick little ones are being miraculously healed! The prayers of God's people are penetrating the cloak of darkness that satan has thrown over "modern" Christians. The apathy that has weakened the American church is slowly but surely being removed. I can feel the rumble of the Church as it wakes up. A "sleeping giant" Casting Crowns says.
The Orphan's Prayer (taken from the magazine "All God's Children")
I am waiting...somewhere far...far...away on the other side of the world. I may not know who you are or what you look like, but some how deep in my heart I know you are out there. That one day you will come and find me. It's a long journey,and it takes a lot of time... I wish it could be easier. But I know that the ones who come for me will not count the cost. They will only see the joy of finding me. For now I abide in the fields of the fatherless. Day by day wondering why I was born here and not somewhere else? Asking....why my life couldn't have been different.
My arms long to be wrapped in a father's embrace..I long to be saved by a
mother's love...
somehow I feel assured, that no matter how lost I appear I am not alone,
me every time I call. He whispers his promises in my ear. I listen with hope to
His voice.
little child, so lost can be found?
make a way through the fields. That he will personally cut a path,and lead
you right to my orphanage door.
other side of the world... TO COME HOME.
Maybe somewhere tonight, on the other side of the world, or just around the corner, a child is praying this prayer and God is calling YOU! From first hand experience I can tell you that you will NEVER be sorry. What are you waiting for?
No comments:
Post a Comment