I haven't written about home schooling lately, but I have had some things on my mind that I think are worth sharing. Maybe they will be an encouragement to someone reading.
First, yes, we are still home schooling. That is not likely to change anytime in the future. Home schooling was one call I heard loud and clear, and on the days I want to throw in the towel, I think back to the day He called. If I didn't know better, I would assure you that God said it out loud. Never before or since have I heard Him say something and then I turned to look over my shoulder to see who was in the room. I wish He spoke so loudly all the time, but that is just not the way He typically speaks to me. About home schooling, though, He did. He knew there would be days when the yellow bus beckoned, and I would need the reassurance that I am right where He wants me to be.
When God called us to home school, our oldest, twins, were four years old. They were sweet, compliant children and one of them could already read. In fact, they were the type of children that made you feel like a really good parent. They didn't sneak off a make random messes, they soaked up knowledge like little sponges, they played for hours with just each other and their imaginations and they were thrilled with every new thing I introduced them to. The first year, we spent our days reading piles and piles of books, taking nature walks and recording our findings in our "nature journals," learning to write their names, going to the zoo and playing house with their new baby sister who had been born just a couple of months before. She was an excellent baby and at the end of that first year, I was so proud of myself for having this home schooling thing down pat.
Then, the baby started walking and I realized that all children are not cut from the same mold. Either that or I was seriously losing my touch.
God blessed me with my two compliant learners first because He knew that if my next two had been first, I would have thrown in the towel, regardless of my calling. Both of them have fought me every single step of the way. They don't like to read and they despise anything that resembles "school." Both of them are very hands on, and the only thing they truly enjoy is a good, explosive science experiment. They don't want to go to "real" school, they just don't want to do anything that resembles academics. Our 14 year old is a million times better this year. She still doesn't enjoy much of anything school related, but she realizes that the time has come to buckle down and so she does accomplish her daily list. Our 10 year old has come to no such realization. On top of that we are back in the toddler business, with a very busy two year old in the house. Much to my immense relief, he loves to sit and listen to me read stacks of books and reminds me a lot of my oldest. God is being gracious to me in my old age. He knows that I will be 54 by the time Patrick graduates from high school. I'm tired just thinking about it.
I have recently been talking to several moms with young children. Just starting out in their home schooling journey and wondering how in the world they will get it all done with multiple ages to school.
My short answer - you won't.
To elaborate a little - it doesn't really matter in the long run. When God spoke to me on the issue of home schooling, I had to assume He had a reason. I now know that part of that reason was to stretch and grow me in ways that could never have happened any other way. That was only part of it though. The other part was to raise arrows. The Psalmist tells us that "children are like arrows in the hands of a warrior." God gave Stan and me a very important job. To raise children that have the capability to pierce the darkness. Phillipians 2:15 says, "that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world." We are first generation home schoolers, but if Jesus tarries, I pray that our children will carry this torch. Many home school leaders call my children and their counterparts the "Joshua Generation." We, their parents, like Abraham and the Israelites, have wandered in the wilderness. We took our children and "left Egypt" searching for a way to educate them apart from the secular humanism of the government schools that had so shaped us. We decided we wanted something different for our children. We wanted them to pierce the darkness that is so enveloping our culture. We didn't really have a clue what we were doing and for some it was such a new concept that they had to fight in the courts to make it even legal. They scoured for curriculum and when little was available, they wrote their own and sold it to those of us who came behind them. We are a resourceful bunch if nothing else.
Now, that first generation of home schoolers are adults, functioning well in society and starting to have families of their own. The next generation is coming. And they are coming strong. They are determined, well educated, and steadfast in their beliefs. If you have ever engaged one of these young people you know that despite what our critics say about us, we have not raised a bunch of weak minded parrots who just copy their parents beliefs with no thoughts of their own. Believe me when I tell you that my adult children have absolutely no qualms about disagreeing with me on an issue. They know what they believe, because again, despite what our critics tout, we did not tell them what to think, we taught them how to think. There is a vast difference.
Home schooling for us has never been about academics. I have no illusions that I can teach my kids everything in the world they need to know. No "real" school can do that either - no matter how good the teachers are. My goal has always been that they follow Jesus, no matter where He leads and that they know how to find out anything they need to know. I love it when they love learning, but as I have already said, some of mine don't and I just can't force that to happen. I am still praying that one day the spark ignites, but as long as they are growing closer to Jesus, I am satisfied - overjoyed even. All I ever truly wanted was children who would follow His call - whether that call leads them to the mission field or the board room or anywhere in between. I don't care what my children grow up to be, I care who they grow up to be. I want them to be compassionate, loving, humble. I want them to have an attitude of service and I want them to be sold out followers of Jesus Christ. At the end of the day, that is all I will answer for. That is my ultimate responsibility as their mom.
The bonus is that one on one tutorial is the best method of learning and all of my kids know a lot - much more than I ever learned in school. I know this is true because as I have taught them over the years, I have learned almost as much as they have. They have read thousands of books, and we have spent as many hours discussing those books. They have grown up involved in politics and learning real life skills every single day. They have spent their childhood being useful. They have also had hours and hours to play and imagine and build things. They have learned to shoot guns and bows and arrows and how to build a play fort. They have gardened and grocery shopped and learned to bake bread from scratch. They know how to care for babies and children and how to cook a meal. They are responsible for their own laundry and they have other responsibilities in our family. They are prepared for life.
This past year our oldest, the twins, graduated. We accomplished the goals we set and we called it "done." Learning has not stopped since they got the diploma. They still read countless books - like Les Miserable for fun. They still cook and help with their baby brother and teach Algebra to their younger sister. They still have responsibilities in our family.
I know some of you are wondering how they fared academically. I know that our world puts a lot of stock in that type of thing. SAT scores, GPAs, college admissions. I also know that for certain careers it is important. It just wasn't our focus. To satiate your curiosity though I will tell you that God always pays for what He orders. He called us to home school. He knows what my kids' future looks like and what they need to do. They both did excellent on the SAT and each earned an amazing scholarship to a private university, where they will be freshmen in the fall. Home schooling did not hurt them academically and for those of you in the midst of multiple age groups, dirty diapers, and never feeling accomplished - I promise you I have been there. I am still there. I did not accomplish half of what I planned to do with my oldest. Not half. That makes me sad just because of all the fun we could have had with some of the things I planned, but it did not hinder them academically.
Make Jesus your focus. Nothing else on this earth matters more. Love your children, read to them, talk to them. Teach them to cook, have a tea party, and laugh a lot. I have no regrets about the time I spent with my kids and the time I am still spending with them. Is it hard? Absolutely the hardest thing I have ever endeavored. Is it worth it? To the moon and back again.
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